This all has

something to do with a ridiculous boy with a ridiculous name and eyes the color of changing leaves. i have no time for half-hearted goodbyes or melodramatic similes.

and yet here i am.

formally,
good bye.

ps. i'm glad i didn't lend you any of my shit. and i regret sewing that heart into your sleeve, because in reality, your heart's in your dick.

How can someone

make you feel so high, and then so fucking low?

I'm not your fucking marionette.

Lying is the most fun boys can have without taking their clothes off.

You know what? You're bullshit.
Everything about you.

Even if it kills me.

Lately I've been doubting things I shouldn't be doubting. And I feel inadequate, even though I know you're a jackass.

You nauseate me. But somehow it's not repulsive. The opposite.

Fuck, I dunno, I shouldn't be having second thoughts.

You don't trust me.
But I trust you.

It seems like

nothing ever works out how I plan, but it turns out alright anyway.

But if you think I'm not making an effort, than you're more insane than I originally took you for.

Anyway, I will never again be attending homecoming, for the record. I'm scarred enough as is.

"I'm the most awkward person alive."
"Yeah, somethin' like that."

Drama

is a bitch.

Keep it away from me.

Nonsense.

I know you don't understand me.

To be honest, I don't understand myself either. Isn't that sad? I think I'm a total bitch for what I've done, but I'm only human, and even if that's no excuse... I look out for myself because nobody else will.

There's nothing I could really say that would help my case. I mean, I dunno, it's all my fault. I say that too much, but it always is.

You should have known.
I've told you.

That I'm a waste of time.
And that I will hurt you.


On a less depressing note (oh, wait) HIGHSCHOOL STILL SUCKS!

I don't want to go to school at all; middle school sucked as well. Elementary was great but I'm past that whole being a child thing.

To be honest, I'm kind of bored with myself.

Kickin' off September with style.

Not really.

"Just think of all the thoughts wasted on you."

So. I don't know what to say.

My stomach is sinking like a ship.